S.O.F.T. ‘I’VE BEEN TO BALI TOO’

Finally I am in Bali, that outer suburb of Western Sydney;thankfully we are in Ubud ( not Kuta), which is full of more yoga devotees,Tibetan gong chanting New Agers, and raw vegan biodynamic food with dreadlocks, than the 60’s..It is much better than drunken rampaging bogans! Some may not agree.

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As usual the trip from the coast was a tedious 6 hours in a bus, with the mind numbingly torture of an hour in Nowra!- and on a Sunday, which is even more excruciating than the rest of the week. However the big mistake was flying Virgin. Funny, because I quite like flying Virgin in Oz.

Just as were about to set off on the runway, the engine went CLUNK ; and we spent the next 3 hours sitting like sardines, because the engineers were only going to take 5 minutes to fix the problem! I am not the calmest of travellers and I wanted to rush down the aisle screaming with terror, and throw myself out the door, but I just sat there nervously. And..where was the TV monitor? Nowhere to be seen- because Virgin no longer supplies them! Luckily for me , my ‘Smarty Pants Gen Y ‘daughter had got me to download the Virgin App – and I had an ipad- which I had to precariously hold because Virgin doesn’t even supply a stand. The rest of the passengers had to sit there in dreary boredom..be warned..it can be a long flight without some light entertainment. The only bit of excitement for the other passengers was to stand in line for the toilet. There were 2 toilets for the 200 in cattle class, and another toilet for the 8 people in 1st class.

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 As an added bonus we had a CHALLENGED family sitting behind us, who had not washed for the last year; the smell was overpowering. Mr Stinky kept banging the back of my seat with his knees and spread his feet out to the side of my seat. Man spreading at its worst! I believe he would be arrested on a train in New York.

We arrived in Denpasar 3 hours late, and breezed through customs, immigration and visa formalities, only to wait for 1 hour for our suitcases, obviously there were a few boogie boards to unload. Virgin is one bad arse airline! I sent a prayer of thanks to the patron saint of air travel,that I am returning with Singapore! Probably should have been the patron saint of the internet- with that constant search for those elusive cheap flights.

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The we were out into the warm blast of hot humid air of Denpasar Airport- and we got the WEIRD taxi driver&hellip ; A peanut munching, burping maniac on wheels! And Ubud was an hour away. We were seriously worried. To pass the time the maniac ripped open small bags of peanuts( and didn’t offer any to us- and we were starving) , threw the wrappers out the window, and then burped, really loudly- all this while straddling 2 lanes, or the wrong lane on the other side of the road, way over what speed limit they may have in Bali.

Finally we arrived at the Beji Ubud Resort- the ‘WE’ being my favourite first daughter, who is now known as ‘The Housewife’ as she is no longer employed and moving to San Fran, with her fancy fiancee. I had a previous trip with my favourite second daughter in March. The resort had informed us there were no rooms with twin beds available, until I complained to BOOKINGS.COM- suddenly twin beds were available, but at a price! They threw in the mouldiest room and as an extra bonus , bull frogs the scared us senseless each night- we actually thought it was the burping taxi driver! We joked that they sounded like they were in the room, they were so loud ;and they were!